(he/him)
New to Grow
I don’t view your struggles as a lack of willpower; I view them as the creative ways your survival brain has tried to keep you safe. With 45 years of clinical experience, I specialize in working with thoughtful individuals who have learned to cope with anxiety and low self-confidence by playing small, withdrawing, or quietly shrinking their lives. My approach is anchored in whole-being psychology and deep somatic awareness. I understand that you cannot challenge old, rigid scripts until you feel entirely safe. Because of this, our work begins with gentle understanding and deep respect for your fears. I focus on building an unshakeable therapeutic relationship so that you never feel judged or rushed. Once that foundation of trust is secure, we transition into more direct, active methods. Drawing on mindfulness and values-based action, I will help you look honestly at the patterns holding you back. My own long-term practice in martial arts and internal energy mechanics informs my clinical work, giving me a deep appreciation for the balance between stillness and action, yielding and standing firm. Together, we will honor the protective walls you built in the past, while gently and firmly dismantling them so you can step into an expanded, fully realized life.
Your First Session: Establishing Safe Ground A first session with me isn't an interrogation, a cold clinical intake, or a high-pressure performance. If you are used to navigating the world from inside a self-protective shell, you already spend enough energy managing your anxiety, calculating your risks, and trying to say the right thing. You don’t need to perform for your therapist. Because of this, our first hour together is designed to do one primary thing: lower your nervous system's defense budget and establish an unshakeable foundation of safety. Here is exactly what you can expect when you step into the room: Slowing Down the Clock: The frantic, demanding pace of the outside world stops at the door. We begin by establishing a rhythm that allows you to breathe out and drop your shoulders. There is no ticking clock forcing you to "fix" a lifetime of patterns in fifty minutes. I meet you precisely where you are, offering a space of quiet presence where you can step out of the pressure to achieve and simply exist. Mapping the Landscape with Total Respect: We will talk about what brings you to therapy, but we do it entirely at your speed. If certain memories, fears, or old wounds feel too raw or vulnerable to touch, we leave them alone. You control the dial on how much you share. My role in this initial stage is to listen with deep, somatic empathy, ensuring you feel completely heard and never exposed. Shifting from Self-Blame to Radical Curiosity: If you are like most people who struggle with avoidance, you probably carry a heavy dose of self-criticism for the ways you shrink your life or withdraw from connection. In our first session, we start dismantling that guilt. We will look at your coping mechanisms not as personal failures, but as the creative, highly intelligent strategies your survival brain designed to keep you safe. When you see that your armor was built out of a need for protection rather than weakness, the healing can actually begin. Experiencing the Therapeutic Container: By the end of our time, you won’t just leave with a dry, clinical treatment plan. You will leave having experienced what it physically feels like to be truly seen, respected, and accepted without an ounce of judgment. You will have a tangible sense of what it means to be anchored in a secure relationship. We are laying the first stone of a foundation that can hold the full weight of your fears and your lack of self-confidence. We aren't rushing into
The Unique Foundation of My Approach What makes a session with me distinct isn’t just the clinical frameworks I use, but the life experiences that inform how I show up for you. Forty-Five Years of Deep Listening: After nearly five decades in this field, I have sat across from almost every version of human suffering and resilience. This tenure means nothing surprises me, nothing shocks me, and I am entirely comfortable sitting in the dark, quiet corners of life with you. I don’t feel a frantic, rookie need to "fix" you or rush your process. I have the patience that only comes from a lifetime of watching people successfully heal on their own timeline. The Grounded Presence of Tai Chi and Martial Arts: My decades-long practice of Tai Chi and internal martial arts deeply influences my clinical presence. It has taught me the mechanics of internal energy, stillness, and balance. In therapy, this translates to an unshakeable, calm somatic presence. I know how to drop my own center so that when you are spinning in anxiety or frozen in fear, you can look at me and find a steady anchor. I understand when to yield with empathy and when to stand firm like a mountain. The Perspective of a Storyteller: As a novelist, I spend hours studying the human condition, narrative structure, and why people get stuck in repetitive loops. I view your life through a non-linear lens. I don't see you as a broken machine needing a tune-up; I see you as a complex individual who has become trapped in an old, rigid script that no longer serves the hero of the story. Together, we work to rewrite that narrative. How I Quietly Hold Space For an avoidant or anxious client, the world is a loud, demanding place full of pressure to perform. When I hold space for you, I am creating a deliberate counter-culture to that noise. Quietly holding space means I offer you a high-safety, low-demand environment. It is the therapeutic equivalent of lowering your nervous system's defense budget. I tune into the somatic energy in the room—not just the words you are saying, but the tension in your shoulders, the holding of your breath, and the quiet spaces between your thoughts. I listen with a gentle, unconditional understanding that allows you to drop your armor. You don't have to achieve anything on my couch; you just have to exist. This deep validation is the fertile soil where self-confidence can finally begin to take root. How I Gently Confront Non-Working Behaviors Gentle confrontatio
My ideal client is a deeply reflective, high-functioning individual who is trapped in a frozen state of chronic avoidance. Paralyzed by the rigid, old scripts of an overactive survival brain, they cope with fear and a profound lack of self-confidence by quietly shrinking their life, withdrawing from deep connection, and numbing out to maintain a false sense of safety. They aren't looking for a chaotic battleground; they are fighting a quiet, internal war against their own self-protective walls. I do not rush them or force compliance. My approach begins with deep, somatic empathy and gentle understanding, creating an unshakeable foundation of clinical safety. Once they know I genuinely care and respect their fears, I transition to more direct, values-based interventions. By honoring their vulnerability while firmly challenging their protective loops, I guide them to step past old limitations and finally live an expanded, fully realized life.
Other specialties
I identify as
Acceptance and commitment (ACT)
In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), we work together to help you stop fighting difficult thoughts and emotions, so you can accept them as normal human experiences instead. Through this process, you clarify your core values and commit to taking real, meaningful action that aligns with the kind of life you actually want to live.
EMDR
In EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing), I help you access and rework traumatic memories by using bilateral stimulation—such as side-to-side eye movements, taps, or tones. This rhythmic tracking jump starts your brain's natural information-processing system, taking the emotional "sting" out of distressing memories so they can be stored as normal historical events rather than active, vivid threats.
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP)
In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), I help you identify the subconscious patterns in how you think (neuro) and speak (linguistic) that dictate your daily behavior (programming). By bringing these automatic loops into awareness, you can learn to consciously shift your language and mental framing to break old habits and cultivate more effective ways of responding to the world.
Brainspotting
In Brainspotting, I help you locate specific eye positions—or "brainspots"—that correlate directly with where your brain is holding emotional trauma or physical stress. By maintaining your gaze on that precise visual spot while focusing inward, you bypass the thinking mind to access the deeper, parts of the brain where traumatic memories are stored, allowing the nervous system to naturally process and release the stuck energy.
Faith based therapy
In Faith-Based Therapy, I help you integrate psychological practices with your specific spiritual beliefs, scriptural teachings, and worldview. By anchoring the therapeutic process in your relationship with the divine or a higher power, it allows you to draw on your faith as a primary source of strength, meaning, and healing while navigating life's challenges.