Licensed to practice in California and accepts 9 insurances. Specializes in Anxiety, Couples Counseling, Depression and 9 more.
New to Grow
I'm Alexis DeFendis, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and I believe that healing happens through genuine connection, curiosity, and feeling truly understood. My path to becoming a therapist wasn't a straight line. Before entering the counseling profession, I spent years working in neuroscience research and health technology. While that work was meaningful, I eventually realized what fulfilled me most wasn't analyzing data—it was understanding people. Becoming a therapist became more than a career change; it became part of my own journey of healing and discovering my purpose. That experience allows me to sit with clients not only as a clinician but as someone who understands what it feels like to question your direction, navigate life's unexpected challenges, and create meaningful change. Today, I work with adults, couples, and individuals facing anxiety, depression, trauma, relationship concerns, life transitions, stress, and burnout. My approach is warm, collaborative, and grounded in evidence-based practices including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), mindfulness, and systems-based interventions. I believe therapy isn't about "fixing" who you are—it's about helping you better understand yourself, build resilience, and create a life that feels authentic and fulfilling. Whether you're feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or simply looking for a space where you can be yourself without judgment, I'm honored to walk alongside you. My goal is to create a therapeutic relationship where you feel safe, supported, and empowered to make lasting change.
Starting therapy can feel intimidating, and it's completely normal to wonder what that first session will be like. My goal is to make it feel less like an interview and more like the beginning of a conversation. I take a person-centered approach, which means our first session is about getting to know you—not just the challenges that brought you here, but the person behind them. I want to understand your story, your strengths, your relationships, your values, and what you hope will be different in your life. Together, we'll begin exploring your goals and what healing looks like for you. Rather than rushing to solve problems or offering quick fixes, I believe lasting change starts by building a strong foundation. You can't untangle years of experiences in a single session, just as you can't learn to swim by jumping into the deep end. First, we wade into the water together. We take the time to understand where you've been, what has shaped you, and what you need to feel safe before moving toward deeper work. Therapy is a collaborative process, and you'll never be expected to move faster than you're ready. My role is to walk alongside you, offering compassion, curiosity, and practical tools as we work toward the life you want to create. There is no pressure to have everything figured out before you walk through the door. You only need to show up exactly as you are.
I believe therapy should create meaningful, lasting change—not become something you feel stuck doing indefinitely. One of my greatest strengths as a therapist is balancing compassion with purpose. I take the time to truly know you, understand your story, and build a relationship where you feel safe enough to be honest and vulnerable. At the same time, I'm intentional about helping you make progress. Every session should move us closer to the goals that matter most to you. I don't believe in rushing the process, but I also don't believe in staying stuck. Healing takes time, and there are no shortcuts, but therapy should have direction. Together, we'll identify what is keeping you from living the life you want, develop practical tools, and work toward creating lasting change—not dependence on therapy. My goal isn't for you to be my client forever. My goal is for you to gain the insight, confidence, and skills to navigate life's challenges long after our work together has ended. If we do our work well, you'll leave therapy feeling more empowered, more connected to yourself, and equipped to continue growing on your own. Throughout that process, I'll meet you with honesty, curiosity, and compassion. I'll celebrate your successes, gently challenge patterns that no longer serve you, and support you every step of the way. Therapy works best when it's a collaborative partnership, and I'm committed to making every session meaningful.
Change is hard—but staying stuck is often harder. I specialize in working with individuals who are ready to stop surviving and start living more intentionally. If you're tired of feeling controlled by your emotions, struggling in your relationships, or repeating patterns that no longer serve you, therapy can be a place to create real, lasting change. My role is to provide a supportive, nonjudgmental space while also helping you challenge the patterns that are keeping you stuck. Together, we'll work toward greater emotional regulation, healthier relationships, and a life that feels more balanced and fulfilling.
Other specialties
I identify as
Attachment-based
Change occurs through exploration of your past and current parental/relational attachments and trauma in the environment of a healing, secure, and reliable relationship. Additionally, I will help raise awareness of the problematic behavioral and emotional patterns formed during your childhood and ultimately improve the quality of attachment with others.
Cognitive Behavioral (CBT)
Change occurs by learning to modify ways of thinking that aren't working for you. I will help you understand the relationship between your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors and together we will change your thinking patterns to cope with stressors in a more positive.
Dialectical Behavior (DBT)
Through mindfulness, developing skills in distress tolerance and emotion regulation, and improving your problem-solving skills you will be able to accept uncomfortable thoughts instead of struggling with them
Person-centered (Rogerian)
I will come to the session with genuineness, unconditional positive regard, and empathy to help you with self-acceptance, decrease your defensiveness and insecurity. The goal is for you to experience and express feelings with the safe support of the therapist.
Structural Family Therapy
Do you ever feel like your family seems to be "stuck"? Having the same arguments and constant disrespect between members? This treatment method brings about change by restructuring the family's organization and dysfunctional interactions to allow for symptom relief and constructive problem-solving.