Kristen Montiel

(she/her)

LMFT, 15 years of experience

Often rebooked

Solution oriented
Authentic
Warm
VirtualAvailable

Hi, I’m Dr. Kristen Montiel. If you’re here, chances are something in your relationship, or within yourself, feels harder than it should. You might be: -Overthinking, anxious, or needing reassurance in relationships - Feeling disconnected from your partner, even when things seem to be going okay -Trying to repair after a betrayal or affair and unsure how to move forward - You are a high-achieving, self-aware person who’s frustrated that insight hasn’t led to change yet I specialize in working with high-achieving individuals and couples, including those navigating affair recovery, parenthood, anxiety, and relationship disconnection. I know searching for a therapist can be a daunting process but I'm so glad you're here! With over 15 years of experience and training in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and the Gottman Method, I help clients understand the deeper patterns driving their experiences and how to actually change them. My goal is to help you feel more secure, connected, and confident in your relationships and in yourself.

Get to know me

In our first session together, here's what you can expect

The first session is a chance for us to get to know each other and make sure it feels like a good fit. We’ll talk about what’s bringing you in, what’s been feeling difficult, and what you’re hoping will change. You don’t need to have everything figured out or know exactly what to say, I’ll can guide the conversation in a way that feels comfortable and manageable. You can expect me to ask thoughtful questions, share initial impressions, and begin identifying patterns that may be contributing to what you’re experiencing. By the end of the session, we’ll start to outline a clear direction for our work together so you leave with a better understanding of what’s going on and what the path forward could look like.

The biggest strengths that I bring into our sessions

My greatest strength is helping clients move beyond insight into real, lasting change. Many of the people I work with are already self-aware, they may understand their patterns but still feel stuck in them. I help bridge that gap by focusing not just on understanding, but on shifting the emotional and relational patterns underneath. I am direct, while still warm and supportive. I give practical feedback, offering tools that actually work in real life and real relationships. I pride myself in being collaborative and responsive to feedback. I work to create a space where you feel understood, but also gently challenged, so that meaningful change can happen.

The clients I'm best positioned to serve

The clients I’m best positioned to serve are those who feel stuck in patterns that no longer make sense, especially when they’ve already done a lot of personal work. You may find yourself thinking: - I understand my patterns, but why can't I seem to find lasting change? - Why do I feel so anxious or dissatisfied in my relationship when everything else in my life is going well? - Can we actually change or recover from this, or is too much damage done? Many of my clients come to me after trying other approaches that helped them gain insight, but didn’t create the deeper change they were looking for. I enjoy clients who are motivated for growth, open to exploring deeper emotional patterns, and ready to move beyond surface-level solutions. In our work together, we focus on understanding the deeper patterns driving these experiences and creating meaningful, lasting change. I also have experience supporting clients with anxiety, depression, and addictive behaviors, and I relate well to military members, veterans, law enforcement, and their families.

Specialties

Top specialties

Anxiety

Other specialties

I identify as

Serves ages

Licensed in

California

Location

Virtual

My treatment methods

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

EFT is one of my primary approaches for working with couples, especially those feeling disconnected or navigating betrayal. In this work, we focus on understanding the emotional and attachment patterns underneath conflict. Instead of staying stuck in the same cycles, you begin to feel heard, understood, and more connected to each other. This often leads to: Less conflict and reactivity Greater emotional safety Deeper intimacy and connection

Gottman method

I also integrate the Gottman Method, which provides practical tools to improve communication and strengthen your relationship. This helps couples: Navigate conflict in a healthier, more productive way Break out of repetitive negative cycles Learn how to truly hear and respond to one another Rebuild trust and connection over time

Cognitive Behavioral (CBT)

For individuals struggling with anxiety or depression, I incorporate CBT to help identify and shift unhelpful thought patterns. But we don’t just “challenge thoughts," we work to understand where they come from and how to respond to them in a way that feels more grounded, compassionate, and effective.

, 73 ratings

4 ratings with written reviews

October 6, 2025

You can tell Kirsten experience shows and she has a lot of knowledge when it comes to relationships/addiction.

Verified client, age 25-34
Review shared after session 1 with Kristen

July 18, 2025

Kristin is competent, insightful, and empathetic--a combination that I've learned to value in my search for a therapist.

Verified client, age 55-64
Review shared after session 1 with Kristen

June 16, 2025

For this being our first session, I just felt really understood and empowered. It helped me to feel like I could breathe again and see the light.

Verified client, age 25-34
Review shared after session 1 with Kristen