In our first session together, here's what you can expect

Starting couples therapy can bring up a mix of emotions; hope, nervousness, uncertainty, and even fear. Many couples worry about being judged, blamed, or forced to relive conflict without support. My goal in the first session is to create a space that feels structured, respectful, and emotionally safe, so both partners feel supported from the very beginning. The first session is not about determining who is “right” or “wrong.” It is about understanding what brings you to therapy, how your relationship has been impacted, and what you hope will be different as a result of this work. Early in the session, I will review confidentiality, my role as a couples therapist, and how I work to support both partners fairly. I do not take sides, and I am not there to referee arguments. Instead, I help slow conversations down, notice patterns, and make space for each partner’s experience. Many couples feel relieved to discover that therapy has structure. If conversations begin to escalate, I will gently intervene to keep things emotionally safe and productive. You don’t have to manage this on your own, that’s part of my job. A significant portion of the first session is spent getting to know you as individuals and as a couple. I’ll ask about how you met, what initially drew you to each other, and what has helped you stay connected over time. Even if things feel difficult now, these questions matter, they help us remember the strengths that exist alongside the challenges. We will also explore what led you to seek therapy at this moment. You’ll each have space to share your perspective on the relationship and what feels most urgent or painful right now. My role is to ensure both voices are heard, especially if one partner tends to dominate or withdraw during difficult conversations. Rather than focusing on isolated incidents, I listen for patterns, repeated cycles of interaction that leave both partners feeling stuck. These patterns often show up as pursue-withdraw dynamics, escalating arguments, emotional shutdown, or long periods of disconnection. In the first session, we may begin naming these patterns together. This can be a powerful shift. When couples start to see the problem as the pattern rather than each other it often reduces defensiveness and opens the door to change. Toward the end of the session, we’ll talk about what you each hope to gain from couples therapy. Goals may include improving communication, rebuilding trust, reconnecting emotionally, navigating difficult conversations. Others leave feeling thoughtful or emotionally stirred. All of these reactions are normal. My intention is that you leave with a clearer understanding of your relationship dynamics, a sense of direction, and the reassurance that change is possible. Couples therapy is not about fixing what’s broken, it’s about learning how to turn toward each other with more clarity, care, and intention.

The biggest strengths that I bring into our sessions

What sets my work apart as a couples therapist is my ability to help partners slow down and truly understand what is happening beneath the surface of their conflict. I don’t focus on who is right or wrong. Instead, I help couples identify the patterns they are stuck in, how those patterns developed, and how each partner unintentionally keeps them going. This shift - from blame to understanding - is often where meaningful change begins. I bring a balanced approach that blends structure with compassion. Using evidence-based methods such as Emotionally Focused Therapy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, I help couples make sense of both their emotional experiences and their thought patterns. This allows partners to understand not only what they are feeling, but why they react the way they do, and how to respond differently. My style is active and engaged, offering clear guidance while honoring each partner’s lived experience. Clients often share that they feel deeply seen and respected in my presence, even when conversations are difficult. I create a space where honesty is encouraged and accountability is held with care, not judgment. I am skilled at helping couples navigate intense emotions, interrupt unproductive cycles in real time, and practice new ways of communicating during sessions, not just talking about them. What makes me effective in this work is my ability to hold complexity. I understand that relationships are shaped by personal history, attachment, stress, culture, and identity. I work with curiosity and warmth, while also challenging couples to move beyond old habits that no longer serve them. My goal is not to “fix” anyone, but to help partners reconnect with themselves and each other in ways that feel authentic, sustainable, and grounded in mutual respect.

The clients I'm best positioned to serve

My ideal clients are couples who care deeply about their relationship, even if right now it feels strained, exhausting, or stuck. They may not know how to fix what’s happening between them, but they know something matters enough to try. They are partners who feel caught in painful cycles of conflict, distance, misunderstanding, or silence and want support in finding their way back to connection. Many of the couples I work with come to therapy feeling frustrated and discouraged. Conversations that once felt easy now turn into arguments. Small disagreements escalate quickly, or difficult topics are avoided altogether. One or both partners may feel unheard, unseen, or emotionally alone, even while sharing a life together. These couples often say things like, “We keep having the same fight”, “We don’t know how to talk without it blowing up”, or “It feels like we’re roommates instead of partners.” I work best with couples who are willing to look not only at what is happening in their relationship, but how they are each participating in the patterns that keep it going. My ideal clients understand that couples therapy is not about blaming or proving who is right. It is about learning to take responsibility for one’s role in the dynamic and practicing new ways of relating. Even when motivation is uneven, I help couples find a shared purpose; protecting the relationship itself. Many couples seek therapy because conflict feels constant and unproductive. Arguments may revolve around communication, finances, intimacy, parenting, boundaries with family, or unresolved past hurts. Often, the surface issue changes, but the emotional experience underneath remains the same; one partner pursues, the other withdraws; one criticizes, the other shuts down; both feel misunderstood. My ideal clients are couples who want to interrupt these cycles rather than relive them. They may feel emotionally flooded during conflict or struggle to recover after disagreements. In therapy, we slow these moments down, identify triggers, explore underlying needs, and build skills for repair. Couples learn how to express themselves clearly without attacking and how to listen without becoming defensive. Not all couples come to therapy because they argue. Some come because they feel distant. Emotional disconnection can look like parallel lives, lack of intimacy, limited vulnerability, or a sense that the relationship has lost its spark. These couples may still function well on the outside - managing careers, households, and responsibilities, but feel lonely inside the relationship.