Finding the right therapist is a tricky task. Especially if you’re seeking professional help for the first time, all the options can be overwhelming, and you might not know where to start.
You might be considering the option of choosing a therapist like you; someone who shares similar characteristics such as gender, sexuality, ethnicity, cultural background, and age demographic.
These factors can greatly impact the therapeutic relationship, but is that always a good thing? Read on to learn about the pros and cons of choosing a therapist like you and the importance of considering these factors.
Pros of Choosing a Therapist Who is Similar to You
Choosing a therapist like you can come along with many perks. Here are five pros to consider when choosing a mental health professional who’s similar to you.
Comfort and Rapport
Comfort, rapport, and trust are crucial in a therapeutic alliance. The more you feel comfortable and safe with your therapist, the better you’ll be able to trust them and open up fully in your therapy sessions.
“Having a therapist similar to you may help build rapport faster because, depending upon the similarities, a therapist may already be able to understand where you’re coming from and what you’re going through,” says Martinique Moron, a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW) with Grow Therapy. This comfort you feel will help you feel more at ease when sharing your struggles, allowing you to feel safe, understood, and validated. Plus, Moron says you’ll feel less likely to be judged by someone in the same shoes as you.
Enhanced Empathy and Understanding
The empathy and understanding you’ll experience from a therapist who’s similar to you can be like an unspoken bond – they just get it.
“Getting support from someone who understands the dynamic of growing up in certain neighborhoods or having certain experiences helps create a stronger therapeutic alliance,” says Jermain Wright, a licensed professional counselor (LPC) with Grow Therapy.
These shared cultural and life experiences can lead to deeper empathy and a better understanding of cultural norms and issues that specific demographics face.
This will be a big help if you’re in therapy to try to navigate identity-related challenges. Their extra experience and understanding can help you work through any identity struggles.
Communication and Relatability
Working with a mental health professional from the same background as you can result in easy, smooth communication. You can feel free to mention certain buzzwords, slang, or cultural references with the expectation that they’ll know what you mean.
There will also be a reduced risk of miscommunication and misunderstandings. For example, if you’re transgender, you might feel most comfortable working with a therapist who’s also trans since you won’t have to explain certain terms or challenges that trans folks deal with, such as transitions, pronouns, and hormone therapy. You can talk freely, knowing your therapist can relate.
Cultural Competence
Cultural competence ensures you’ll feel understood and validated without explaining cultural context. A therapist similar to you can appropriately address specific cultural issues and challenges effectively, whether that’s about issues that affect LGBTQIA+, BIPOC, immigrants, or people with disabilities.
In this case, you won’t have to take up time of your session educating your therapist about specific cultural issues, Moron says. This can make the conversation flow more freely and easily.
You may also consider intersectionality here, which recognizes that individuals have multiple, overlapping identities and experiences, such as race, gender, sexuality, and more. For example, a therapist who shares your experiences as a queer person of color may better understand the unique challenges you face at the intersection of race and sexuality.
Lastly, a therapist similar to you can help you build further cultural awareness, using therapy as a means to understanding your own cultural context.
Fostering Empowerment
You can feel empowered seeing someone from a similar background in a professional role. “It builds a sense of, ‘Oh, I can do that too!’ or ‘There’s space for me in this niche or role,’” says Moron.
Even if you aren’t trying to pursue a career in the mental health field, it can still empower you to see someone from a similar background thriving professionally.
Cons of Choosing a Therapist Who is Similar to You
Although you can’t deny the benefits of those “pros,” it’s important to consider that there are potential downsides as well. Choosing a mental health professional similar to you doesn’t guarantee that everything will go perfectly, and there can certainly be some red flags. Here are four cons to consider.
Limited Perspective
When working with someone just like you, you may miss out on different perspectives, ways of seeing things, and ways to cope, Moron says. You may not experience the diverse viewpoints and approaches of someone from a different background. Sometimes, having a totally different perspective can make a big difference.
Potential Bias and Assumptions
Therapists are humans, too, and although they shouldn’t jump to conclusions, it’s possible that they might make assumptions based on your shared background.
Perhaps you remind them of themselves or even someone else in their life, which ends up impacting reactions or creating biases about you. This is known as countertransference, Moron says. This could potentially affect their objectivity and, in the long run, the effectiveness of your treatment.
Over-identification
In a similar vein to countertransference, it’s possible for a mental health professional to see a little too much of themselves in you, or it could bring back old memories, which could backfire. In situations like this, it can make it difficult for a therapist to be as objective as they need to be with you, says Wright.
Not to mention, the lines can get blurry with boundaries on both the therapist’s end and your end, especially when there are many similarities, which might make it feel a bit too much like a friendship rather than a therapist-client relationship, Wright says. This isn’t healthy for either of you.
Professional Limitations
While shared experiences can certainly foster trust and understanding, is triggered by something that hits too close to home, they might project their own issues. This can hinder therapeutic progress since the therapist can’t remove their own experiences from their engagement with you.
Finding the Right Therapist for You
When it comes down to it, it’s important to find a balance between someone who is super similar to you and someone very different from you. Remember, just because someone’s of a similar demographic, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re the right therapist for you.
Consider both pros and cons when you’re looking for a therapist. Put your comfort and needs first. Ask yourself what you need the most help with and what you want from therapy. Wright emphasizes the importance of not just choosing a therapist based on their background and how similar they are to you but also basing it on their clinical training, certifications, areas of expertise, and types of therapy they practice.
You might find the best results finding someone who specializes in your specific mental health concern and uses a therapy modality or mix of modalities that are evidence-based and proven to benefit these conditions. For example:
- If you have an anxiety disorder, consider a therapist who specializes in anxiety and practices cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT).
- If you’re a trauma survivor, consider a trauma-informed therapist who practices eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR).
- If you struggle with self-harm or suicidal ideation, consider a therapist experienced in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT).
- If you have problems within a romantic partnership or family dynamic, consider couples therapy or family therapy.
A few other factors to consider are:
- Confirmation of licensure and type of licensure: For example, do you prefer a psychologist (PsyD) with a clinical psychology background? Or do you prefer someone with a master’s degree and a social work background?
- Finances: Therapy sessions can be pricey. Cost varies based on whether someone is in private practice, if they offer a sliding-scale, if they accept your insurance company, and their licensure.
- In-person sessions versus online therapy: There are plenty of unique benefits for both in-person and online therapy. Both are effective, but it depends on your specific needs.
After finding a qualified licensed therapist who meets your needs, you can then consider if you want to find one within those parameters who also happens to be from a similar background to you.
Grow Therapy is here to help you discover how to find the right therapist for your needs. On our site, you can use our filters to search for therapists in your state who accept your insurance plan. We offer both online therapy and in-person care from qualified professionals with all types of specialties, from all different backgrounds.
Get started today to find the right therapist for you.
