(he/him)
New to Grow
I’m Philip A. Bower, a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Philip A Bower, LICSW, a gay veteran-owned psychotherapy practice. I provide telehealth therapy for adults from early adulthood through later life in Massachusetts, Maine, and Washington. I specialize in anxiety, LGBTQIA+ concerns, men’s mental health, trauma, depression, identity exploration, and life transitions. I also work with clients navigating sexual identity, polyamory, kink, geek culture, spiritual exploration, stress, shame, relationship challenges, and the pressure of living in roles that no longer fit. My approach is evidence-based, holistic, affirming, and human. I draw from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (M-CBT), mindfulness, self-compassion mindfulness, and polyvagal-informed techniques. I tailor therapy to each person’s needs, goals, and lived experience rather than using a one-size-fits-all approach. I believe therapy can help with both symptom relief and deeper change. That may mean reducing anxiety, improving coping skills, processing trauma, building self-understanding, strengthening relationships, or moving toward a life that feels more authentic, self-defined, and whole. I aim to offer therapy that feels grounded, thoughtful, and real. You do not need to have everything figured out before you begin. If you are looking for affirming, trauma-informed therapy that makes room for complexity and helps you move toward the person you want to become, I may be a good fit.
Your first session is a chance for us to get oriented, not a test you have to pass. My goal is to understand what is bringing you to therapy, what has been feeling difficult, and what kind of support you are hoping for right now. In our first meeting, we’ll usually talk about the concerns that led you to reach out. That may include anxiety, depression, trauma, stress, grief, burnout, identity questions, men’s mental health concerns, LGBTQIA+ concerns, relationship challenges, life transitions, sexual identity, or the feeling that your life no longer fits who you are becoming. Some clients come in with very clear goals. Others just know that something feels heavy, disconnected, overwhelming, or unsustainable. Both are completely okay. I’ll also ask some background questions so I can get a fuller picture of your life and what support might be most helpful. This may include your mental health history, past therapy experiences, current stressors, coping patterns, supports, relationships, and day-to-day functioning. If relevant, we may also talk about how identity, culture, gender, sexuality, spirituality, polyamory, kink, geek culture, or other parts of your lived experience shape what you are going through. My goal is not to make assumptions or fit you into a narrow category. It is to understand you in a way that respects the complexity of your life. The first session is also a chance for you to get a feel for me and for how I work. Therapy works best when there is enough fit, trust, and safety to begin building something real. You are welcome to ask questions, notice how the space feels, and pay attention to whether my style feels supportive to you. My approach is warm, grounded, affirming, and practical. I draw from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (M-CBT), mindfulness, self-compassion mindfulness, and polyvagal-informed techniques. In the first session, I am usually focused less on jumping straight into a technique and more on understanding the full picture of what is happening so we can identify what kind of treatment and support would actually be useful. By the end of the first session, we will usually have a clearer sense of your main concerns, what your initial therapy goals might be, and whether continuing together feels like a good fit. You do not need to tell your whole life story in one sitting. We can move at a pace that feels grounded, manageable, and respectful of where you are starting. Most of all, I want the first session to feel like the beginning of a space where you do not have to flatten yourself, perform, or arrive with perfect words in order to be understood.
One of my greatest strengths as a therapist is that I try to hold clinical depth and real human presence at the same time. I care deeply about evidence-based practice, ethical treatment, and approaches that are actually useful, but I also know that people do not come to therapy as neat categories. They come with layered histories, identities, relationships, contradictions, hopes, defenses, pain, and survival patterns. I work hard to make room for that complexity. My approach is grounded in evidence-based care and draws from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (M-CBT), mindfulness, self-compassion mindfulness, and polyvagal-informed techniques. What stands out most about how I use these approaches is that I do not treat them like rigid scripts. I use them thoughtfully and in response to the person in front of me. For example, if someone is struggling with anxiety, we might work with cognitive patterns, avoidance, nervous system activation, and the ways anxiety is shaping daily life. If someone feels disconnected from themselves, trapped in an old identity, or exhausted by roles they’ve had to perform, the work may also involve deeper exploration of authenticity, self-definition, grief, and the gap between survival and choice. If someone has a trauma history, I try to approach that with respect for pacing, safety, and the nervous system, rather than pushing insight faster than the body can hold it. Another strength I bring is affirming care for people whose lives or relationships may not fit conventional boxes. That includes LGBTQIA+ clients, people exploring sexual identity, people in polyamorous or kink relationships, clients connected to geek culture, and people whose spiritual lives are meaningful parts of their inner world. I do not believe people should have to trim away important parts of themselves to receive good therapy. I want the therapy room to be a place where the real shape of your life can exist without being pathologized or flattened. I also think one of my strengths is the kind of emotional tone I try to create. I want therapy to feel grounded, calm, and honest. Not cold, not overly polished, not performative. Just real. Many people have spent a long time being misunderstood, holding things alone, or feeling like they need to package themselves in ways that are easier for other people to tolerate. I try to create a space where that pressure softens enough for more honest work to begin. Clients often need both support and structure. They need room to breathe, but they also need therapy to go somewhere. I try to offer both. That means helping clients reflect, understand patterns, and make meaning, while also offering tools, frameworks, and ways of working that can lead to change in day-to-day life. At the center of my work is a simple idea: therapy can help people move out of the person they were told to be and toward the person they want to become. I think one of my greatest strengths is that I genuinely believe in that process, and I try to meet it with care that is affirming, evidence-based, holistic, and human.
My ideal client is an adult who may be feeling anxious, overwhelmed, emotionally stuck, disconnected from themselves, or caught in roles and expectations that no longer fit. Many of the people I work best with are not only looking for symptom relief, but also trying to understand themselves more deeply and build a life that feels more authentic, self-defined, and sustainable. I am especially well positioned to work with clients dealing with anxiety, trauma, depression, identity exploration, LGBTQIA+ concerns, men’s mental health concerns, life transitions, grief, relationship stress, shame, and burnout. I also work well with clients navigating sexual identity, polyamory, kink, geek culture, spiritual exploration, and the stress of living outside conventional boxes. Many of my clients are thoughtful, insightful, and high-functioning in some parts of life, but privately feel exhausted, trapped, numb, or like they have been surviving for a long time. My ideal client does not need to arrive with perfect language for what is wrong. In fact, many people I work best with are still figuring that out. They may know something feels heavy, unsustainable, or no longer like their own life. They may want help making sense of patterns, managing anxiety, processing trauma, improving relationships, building coping skills, or reconnecting with parts of themselves that have been buried under pressure, performance, or pain. I tend to be a strong fit for adults who want therapy that is affirming, evidence-based, holistic, and emotionally honest. My work draws from ACT, CBT, DBT, M-CBT, mindfulness, self-compassion mindfulness, and polyvagal-informed techniques, so I work best with clients who want both practical tools and deeper self-understanding.
Anxiety
Depression
LGBTQ
Bipolar Disorder
First Responders/Healthcare Workers
Grief
LGBTQ
Man
White
Adults (18 to 64)
Elders (65 and above)
Maine
Arlo
Acceptance and commitment (ACT)
I use ACT to help clients make room for difficult thoughts and feelings without losing sight of who they are and what matters to them. In my practice, I use this approach to support clients in building psychological flexibility, reconnecting with their values, and moving toward a life that feels more intentional and authentic. ACT is especially meaningful in work around anxiety, grief, trauma, identity, and major life transitions.
Cognitive Behavioral (CBT)
I use CBT to help clients understand how thoughts, emotions, and behaviors work together, especially when old patterns begin to keep them feeling stuck. In my practice, I use CBT to help people challenge unhelpful thinking, respond to themselves with more clarity and compassion, and build tools that support real change. It is especially helpful for anxiety, depression, stress, and self-esteem concerns because it gives clients practical strategies they can carry into daily life.
Dialectical Behavior (DBT)
I use DBT-informed interventions to help clients build skills in emotional regulation, mindfulness, distress tolerance, and communication. In my practice, I often use these tools with clients who feel emotionally overloaded, reactive, or exhausted by patterns that affect their relationships and inner sense of stability. I appreciate DBT because it offers grounded, actionable support while still honoring the deeper emotional work of therapy.
Trauma Informed Care
My practice is rooted in trauma-informed care, meaning I approach each client with care for safety, choice, collaboration, and pacing. I use this framework to understand how past wounds and ongoing stress can shape the way a person feels, copes, connects, and moves through the world. In practice, this means creating a space that feels respectful, steady, and empowering, so healing can happen without clients feeling rushed, dismissed, or overwhelmed.
Mindfulness-Based Therapy
I use mindfulness-based therapy to help clients reconnect with themselves in a more grounded, present, and compassionate way. In my practice, this means helping people notice what is happening internally, including thoughts, emotions, and body-based stress, without feeling consumed by it. I often weave mindfulness into therapy for anxiety, trauma, grief, and burnout because it can create space for reflection, regulation, and a deeper sense of connection to one’s own inner life.